


The Heaviness of Heart

by ophiion



Category: Critical Role (Web Series)
Genre: F/M, Grief/Mourning, Hurt, Sadness and angst ensue, Spoilers for 105, This wasn't proof read because I am trash and can only write short things for some reason, character study - sort of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-25
Updated: 2017-07-25
Packaged: 2018-12-06 18:42:35
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11606661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ophiion/pseuds/ophiion
Summary: " It gives her a familiar sense of grieving and she knows that even though her next loss hasn’t come yet she has a feeling it will shake her to the core. Her hands lick with flames, the temptation to set this godly library alight in her anger is overwhelming. She has lost so much, she will continue to lose things."A Short look into how Keyleth is feeling because I love my girl





	The Heaviness of Heart

There is a gaping hole in her stomach where… _something_ is meant to be, Keyleth knows that much. It’s the sinking feeling she’d gotten when her father had told stories of her mother who was never coming home to them, who would never see Keyleth grow beyond a small child. Whose leg and legacy were the only things Keyleth even remotely knew about her mother. The pain that feels sort of like a hunger ravages at her stomach again. It gives her a familiar sense of grieving and she knows that even though her next loss hasn’t come yet she has a feeling it will shake her to the core. Her hands lick with flames, the temptation to set this godly library alight in her anger is overwhelming. She has lost so much, she will continue to lose things.

Vax’s fingers are cold when they touch her so she recoils with some discomfort and pretends that’s anger too. It’s really fear, a reminder that he’s on borrowed time and he’s so at peace with it that she burns every time his hands reach to find her skin, every time an arm curls around her. He’s not hers right now. Keyleth feels like a widow and she's never even been married. She clenches her fists and barrels forwards, if she keeps walking in this endless place maybe she’ll eventually just burn out.

She is rarely so destructive, rarely so willing to watch the world around her burn to the fucking ground but it would feel far freer than how she feels now. Claustrophobic and staring at the uncomfortable faces of Percy and Vex as they, of course, won’t ever be able to understand their mistake. The "surprise" element of their happy union (That she will _never have_ , by the way) and their long glorious lives together (That she will _never have_ , by the way) and the fact that they didn’t even have the gumption to tell her makes her blood boil. Her hands take flame as she storms past Percy who tries to speak to her.

Keyleth doesn’t listen, Keyleth fantasises about wedding dresses she’ll never wear and parents who are dead that would never have seen her get married. She pushes past the tears. They have a Goddess to find.

**Author's Note:**

> I connected with Keyleth's anger so much in Ep. 105 and I needed to write about it, the grief she's experiencing right now and her anger are (to me) so understandable and it makes my heart hurt to see her like this.


End file.
